I moved to Minne Lusa in 2007, so I’m relatively new to the area. I grew up on the opposite side of town. I had never really heard of this area until my older brother bought a house here. I would come to visit him, but I knew little else than how to get to his street. When my wife and I were looking for a house, we had a very specific list of features and amenities that we wanted in a house and in a neighborhood. We found ourselves in Minne Lusa several times and ended up buying our home right on the Boulevard which we dearly love.
Since moving in, I have advocated wholeheartedly for Minne Lusa. I have talked it up to friends, have tried selling area houses to colleagues and family members who may or may not have been in the market, I have preached the virtues of this as a wonderful place to live. I don’t regret a second of it. I firmly stand behind everything I’ve ever said.
However . . . I feel that I have earned the right to say some things. I don’t ever mention them to people because I don’t want them to get the wrong impression of my treasured Minne Lusa, but alas, the time has come for me to talk about . . . What I Hate About Minne Lusa! (Duhn, duhn, duuuuhhnn! *dramatic music*)
1. I get tired of spelling Minne Lusa to every person I talk to who doesn’t live here.
2. I hate giving geography lessons to people. (OK, do you know where the Mormon Bridge is? What about Metro’s Fort Campus? Well if you go north on 75 until it turns into 30th St . . . )
3. I hate that people who don’t live here think it’s “the ghetto.” Do you even know what a ghetto is?
4. I hate that some people who DO live here think it’s “the ghetto.” If this is you, either open your eyes or buy a Celebrity home. (I know I’m going to hear from all my friends who own a Celebrity home. Let’s be real folks, you know my opinions.)
5. I hate that so many people around here still just shrug off the sound of a siren or the sight of a police cruiser as an acceptable daily happening. Most people don’t even stop watching “Glee” long enough to stick their head out the window to see what’s going on.
6. I HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE . . .HATE! . . . the litter that I find on the Boulevard. My son and I take walks on the Boulevard with his little Radio Flyer wagon and absolutely fill it to overflowing with litter. My son is well versed now on how litter “makes the ground sick” and stops to pick up trash every time we’re out. THAT’S NOT MY SON’S JOB!! So to you kids who threw your plastic drink bottles on the ground the other day, I saw you! To the well dressed business man in the new black Impala who tried to discreetly let his Kit-Kat wrapper flutter out of his hand while his arm hung out the window, I saw you! And to the Schmuck in the grey Pontic Vibe who threw a whole Burger King bag out the window as you raced down the Boulevard, I saw you . . .and followed you! I even gave your licence plate number to the “Keep Nebraska Beautiful Litter Hotline” (877-NO LITTR or 877-665-4887 for all you other litter nazis like me). Everyone, PLEASE, quit littering. Just hold onto it until you get home.
What number am I on now? I got all fired up for a minute. Ah yes –
7. I hate that the elm trees that lined the Boulevard decades ago all died off and that they were never replaced with comparable trees.
8. I hate that the beautiful decorative lights that once lined our neighborhood streets were torn out sometime in the past and were never replaced.
9. I hate that I have to bounce and jostle my way home on about every third street because the city has let our streets get so bad.
10. Maybe I hate the bouncy streets a little less when I think about this one. I live across from Minne Lusa elementary, and I cannot even count the number of time during school hours that someone has come racing down the Boulevard at 40-50 mph. There are kids right on the other side of that fence! Cool it, Hot Wheels! I have gotten into the habit of casually walking into the middle of the street when I hear the folk of leaden feet about a block away. This slows them down long enough for me to point out that it is a school zone not a qualifying lap. My neighbor is concerned that one day, he’ll come out to just find me squashed in the road. He might be right. Maybe I should just look into a speed bump instead.
11. Rentals. I don’t hate renters. Some of my best neighbors are renters. But I hate rentals, mostly because landlords don’t care for them the way a homeowner would and renters are limited on what they can do. There’s an entire street of rentals in Minne Lusa where all the houses are owned by one guy. The houses are worn down and neglected. Again, not the renters fault, it’s not their house. Here’s the kicker. The owner lives on the same street! His own house is pristine! I don’t know yet how to approach that issue so I dedicate my resources to areas where I know I can have success, but this is going to be tough nut to crack. And it’s going to have to crack. (Any ideas?)
There are always going to be things that bother us about where we live to some extent because we share the space with other human beings. My wife and I love Minne Lusa and we’re proud to call it home. My son will grow up with utopian memories of this place. I continue to campaign for my treasured Minne Lusa. I love the place, and I am impressed by how much positive momentum I have seen recently. I hope that if you have not checked out Minne Lusa recently, that you like it as much as I do. I hope that I have not scared anyone away.
I would like to hear from you. What are your hot spots in Minne Lusa? What do you love? And (dare I ask?) what do you hate?
**Editing Note – in my comment about litter, I had previously mistakenly said the owner of the Vibe worked at the barber shop on 30th St. I have been corrected on this twice as the owner of the barber shop indeed lives in the area and has a good reputation. The owner of the Vibe has no affiliation with the barber shop or its staff. Thank you to those who corrected me on this mistake.**